Last Tuesday November 19, the nine year-old girl in the picture that won the Pulitzer Prize in 1972 came to speak at Concordia University.
Photo taken by "Nick" Ut.
Because I was writing a story for The Concordian, I was able to interview her. My friend Laura Schülke joined me to listen to her responses.
ML: Tell us about your own camera. Why do you have it always with you?
KP: When I got out of the airplane from Germany to go to Cuba with my fiancé, you couldn’t take anything with you. The only thing I had was my purse, and I always put my camera in my purse. I love taking pictures, that is why it is always with me. I thank God that is with me all the time. That’s why it keep it.
ML: How does your picture speak for more than a thousand words?
KP: It shows everything there. How much I suffered. My face and my brother’s face. How hopeless, how hot. Agony… all this is shown in the picture. It is terrible.
ML: Tell us about your relationship with the photographer. How did he help you after he took the picture?
KP: He dropped me at a nearby hospital very close to my village. He also took all the people who were wounded. But he left to develop the film, so he left. Then, he didn’t know where I was because they moved me to another hospital. But I learned that the next day, he went back to the village to look for me. He wanted to find out what my name was or what had happened to that little girl. But he got wounded at that time. So his friend took him right away from the village. Actually, he went back to visit my family in the village, but I was in the hospital.
I didn’t remember his face. He came back to visit me in the hospital but because I was really ill, I didn’t remember his face. Until 17 years later. I met him in Cuba. That is the first time I remembered him. As soon as I saw him I said: “No! it’s Nick Ut!” And I call him uncle Ut, because we became best friends, and also because in the culture in Vietnam, if you are older, this is the way you address each other.
ML: You were a believer of the Cao Dai religion. Can you tell us why you converted to Christianity?
KP: I was really devoted to that religion. I tried my best. I even became a vegetarian. I didn’t eat meat because if I did, I would become that kind of animal after I died. I was scared to death. But I thought, I am a human and I suffer a lot, so I really wanted to become something better than an animal.
Because I suffered a lot, physically and spiritually after what happened to me, I sought and sought and sought by praying to many gods that the Cao Dai gave to me. Buddha, Confucianism… it includes everything: all the gods that makes the oceans, the sun, the moon… everything! And I prayed so much in Buddha.
I tried my best. But deep down, nobody knew what had happened in my heart. I hated it. It wouldn’t change me. I suffered so much. I hated my life and people. Why are they normal and I am not? Only me and god knew what had happened? Then I started to doubt about god. Where are you? Do you exist somewhere? I didn’t have any answer! I was seeking and seeking in that religion but no answers came.
But finally, I got it. I thank god he allowed me. In the Bible it says: “If you are seeking god with all your heart, he will let you find him.” And that is my case. As soon as Jesus got into my heart, I was able to learn everything. Because the problem doesn’t come from outside. It comes from within. From my heart. And if my heart is healed, it will show up from the outside. Before, my heart was bleeding, angry and bitter. Even though I tried so many times, I failed. I really wanted to die. And over and over again, it didn’t work for me. But what’s important is what is inside. That’s where you heal. And now, I have so much peace, joy, compassion, and it changed my life! Look at that [she shows me her bare arm]. I cannot change everything. But I can change the meaning to me.
ML: When you went to Washington D.C you met John Plummer. How did you reconcile together?
KP: You know what happened? I forgave before I met him. I thank god he healed my heart before I met him. You have to be careful, John Plummer is not the pilot who dropped the bomb. He was coordinating the air strike. He received the order from above and transferred that order to the pilot. A lot of people confuse this, because they don’t want to hear the truth. The media has misunderstood this detail. He never told me he was the pilot. He just transmitted orders. When he heard my words, that I forgave the pilot that dropped the bombs, the forgiveness was transmitted to him as well. I thank god I had that forgiveness. From that moment, that’s why I decided to go back and work with my picture.
ML: Who do you forgive? Or is the enemy within yourself?
KP: Yes. For me, truly, anger and hatred is my real enemy. Even every day, every moment. It just keeps my life down and down to the past where I was miserable. This led me to think that I wanted to die. I was miserable. I questioned myself, who caused this? It’s people. But I didn’t know who exactly. Even if I knew there was a pilot who dropped the bomb, I didn’t know him. But the problem was that I was really living with hatred. That is the way I suffered. And that killed me everyday. And seeing that I recovered, that Jesus died on the cross to pay for my sins, to forgive me, that made my heart heal. I confessed my sins to god, and he forgave. He gave my faith. It was so simple. That changed my life. When I got away from the fire, I didn’t die. But somehow, in the future I will die right? We don’t live forever. But I know that heaven is my home. And that gives me peace. So for me, it is heaven on earth for me now. “El cielo en la tierra.” (She learned Spanish when she went to Cuba.)
ML: I wanted to share a story with you about Jean Paul Samputu, a survivor of the genocide in Rwanda also living here in Montreal. And he is now healed and he says: “Forgiveness is the most powerful but unpopular weapon against terrorism and atrocity.” What is forgiveness for you?
KP: Yes, for me similarly, I say forgiveness is more powerful than any weapon of war. And I want everybody to have the peace that I have. I cannot be selfish to keep it in my heart. “Yes, I got it!” God set me free from hatred. When I talk some people say, oh, it’s because of religion. But I say, no! Religion didn’t save me! Religion is just a name. It is the relationship with the lord that changed me.
ML: In order to transmit that peace within yourself, can you share with us how through your organization, Kim Foundation, you have helped the children in Uganda?
KP: The relationship that I’ve had with them has changed their lives. I shared with them my story and 13 people got saved when I was there. I feel so rich because I have a relationship with people around the world. And I want to give courage. Everyone can do something, small or great. But you can do something to be a blessing and you can change the whole world. You don’t have to wait until you are somebody to do something. It’s too late. Be a blessing, it’s who you are. And god bless you.
Photo taken by Alexei Anikine
Right: Kim Phuc Middle: Monica Lafon Left: Laura Schülke
I asked two Concordia students to tell me their reflections on the conference.
Nathalia Rebolledo – Sociology Student at Concordia
“We take for granted so many things daily, and these things are precious. We don’t think about all the privileges we enjoy and she really helped you reflect on that.”
Adyam Ghebre – Finance student at Concordia
“Taking photography class electives, I came across this photo and found it eerie- the way you can almost hear the screams of the children, the shapes of their mouths. I couldn’t pass this opportunity to hear Kim Phuc’s words. Worth skipping my class for!”
Photo taken by Alexei Anikine
Right: Nathalia Rebolledo Left: Adyam Ghebre
If you have a chance, read this book: “The girl in the picture: The story of Kim Phuc, the photographer and the Vietnam war” By Denise Chong. Penguin Publishing Group, Canada, 1999.
